Duben 2007

James Blunt-Where is my mind

24. dubna 2007 v 20:42 | Verča |  Texty písní
Ooooooh
With your feet in the air and your head on the ground
Try this trick and spin it, yeah
Your head will collapse
But there´s nothing in it
And you´ll ask yourself
Where is my mind [3x]
Way out in the water
See it swimmin´
I was swimmin´ in the Carribean
Animals were hiding behind the rocks
Except the little fish
But they told me I should ask myself
Where is my mind [3x]
Way out in the water
See it swimmin´?
With your feet in the air and your head on the ground
Try this trick and spin it, yeah
Your head will collapse
If there´s nothing in it
And you´ll ask yourself
Where is my mind [3x]
Ooooh
With your feet in the air and your head on the ground
Ooooh
Try this trick and spin it, yeah
Ooooh
Ooooh

James Blunt-Wisemen

24. dubna 2007 v 20:41 | Verča |  Texty písní
She said to me, "Go steady on me.
Won´t you tell me what the Wise Men said?
When they came down from Heaven,
Smoked nine ´til seven,
All the shit that they could find,
But they couldn´t escape from you,
Couldn´t be free of you,
And now they know there´s no way out,
And they´re really sorry now for what they´ve done,
They were three Wise Men just trying to have some fun."

Look who´s alone now,
It´s not me. It´s not me.
Those three Wise Men,
They´ve got a semi by the sea.
Got to ask yourself the question,
Where are you now?

Really sorry now,
They weren´t to know.
They got caught up in your talent show,
With you pernickety little bastards in your fancy dress,
Who just judge each other and try to impress,
But they couldn´t escape from you,
Couldn´t be free of you,
And now they know there´s no way out,
And they´re really sorry now for what they´ve done,
They were three Wise Men just trying to have some fun.

Look who´s alone now,
It´s not me. It´s not me.
Those three Wise Men,
They´ve got a semi by the sea.
Got to ask yourself the question,
Where are you now?

James Blunt-Billy

24. dubna 2007 v 20:40 | Verča |  Texty písní
Billy´s leaving today (don´t know where he´s going).
Holds his head in disgrace (he can´t escape the truth).
He knows the price that he´s paid.
He admits that it´s too late to admit that he´s afraid.
Tomorrow comes. Sorrow becomes his soul mate.
The damage is done. The prodigal son is too late.
Old doors are closed but he´s always open,
To relive time in his mind.
Oh Billy.

Billy´s leaving today (don´t know where he´s going).
He´s got lines on his face (they tell the story of his pain).
He accepts it´s his fate.
He admits it took too long to admit that he was wrong.
Tomorrow comes. Sorrow becomes his soul mate.
The damage is done. The prodigal son is too late.
Old doors are closed but he´s always open,
To relive time in his mind.
Oh Billy.

Once he was a lover sleeping with another.
Now he´s just known as a cheat.
And he wish he´d had a mirror; looked a little clearer.
Seen into the eyes of the weak.
Tomorrow comes. Sorrow becomes his soul mate.
The damage is done. The prodigal son is too late.
Old doors are closed but he´s always open,
To relive time in his mind.
Oh Billy.

James Blunt-Goodbye my lover

24. dubna 2007 v 20:39 | Verča |  Texty písní

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
´Cause I saw the end before we´d begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what´s mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won´t stop there,
I am here for you if you´d only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I´ve kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I´ve been addicted to you.

[x2]
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer and when i wake,
You can´t break my spirit - it´s my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I´ve seen you cry, I´ve seen you smile.
I´ve watched you sleeping for a while.
I´d be the father of your child.
I´d spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We´ve had our doubts but now we´re fine,
And I love you, I swear that´s true.
I cannot live without you.

[x2]
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I´m asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I´m kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I´m so hollow, baby, I´m so hollow.
I´m so, I´m so, I´m so hollow.
I´m so hollow, baby, I´m so hollow.
I´m so, I´m so, I´m so hollow.

James Blunt-High

24. dubna 2007 v 20:38 | Verča |  Texty písní

Beautiful dawn - lights up the shore for me.
There is nothing else in the world,
I´d rather wake up and see (with you).
Beautiful dawn - I´m just chasing time again.
Thought I would die a lonely man, in endless night.
But now I´m high; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it´s hard to believe you remember me.

Beautiful dawn - melt with the stars again.
Do you remember the day when my journey began?
Will you remember the end (of time)?
Beautiful dawn - You´re just blowing my mind again.
Thought I was born to endless night, until you shine.
High; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it´s hard to believe you remember me.

Will you be my shoulder when I´m grey and older?
Promise me tomorrow starts with you,
Getting high; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it´s hard to believe you remember me

James Blunt-You´re beautiful

24. dubna 2007 v 20:37 | Verča |  Texty písní
My life is brilliant.

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I´m sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won´t lose no sleep on that,
´Cause I´ve got a plan.

You´re beautiful. You´re beautiful.
You´re beautiful, it´s true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don´t know what to do,
´Cause I´ll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Flying high, [ - video/radio edited version]
Fucking high, [ - CD version]
And I don´t think that I´ll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You´re beautiful. You´re beautiful.
You´re beautiful, it´s true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don´t know what to do,
´Cause I´ll never be with you.

You´re beautiful. You´re beautiful.
You´re beautiful, it´s true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it´s time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.

Abba-Happy new year

24. dubna 2007 v 20:35 | Verča |  Texty písní
No more champagne
And the fireworks are through
Here we are, me and you
Feeling lost and feeling blue
It´s the end of the party
And the morning seems so grey
So unlike yesterday
Now´s the time for us to say...

Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend
Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have our hopes, our will to try
If we don´t we might as well lay down and die
You and I

Sometimes I see
How the brave new world arrives
And I see how it thrives
In the ashes of our lives
Oh yes, man is a fool
And he thinks he´ll be okay
Dragging on, feet of clay
Never knowing he´s astray
Keeps on going anyway...

Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend
Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have our hopes, our will to try
If we don´t we might as well lay down and die
You and I

Seems to me now
That the dreams we had before
Are all dead, nothing more
Than confetti on the floor
It´s the end of a decade
In another ten years time
Who can say what we´ll find
What lies waiting down the line
In the end of eighty-nine...

Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have a vision now and then
Of a world where every neighbour is a friend
Happy new year
Happy new year
May we all have our hopes, our will to try
If we don´t we might as well lay do

Abba-Medley

24. dubna 2007 v 20:34 | Verča |  Texty písní
Gonna jump down, spin around, pick a bale of cotton
Gonna jump down, spin around, pick a bale a day
Gonna jump down, spin around, pick a bale of cotton
Gonna jump down, spin around, pick a bale a day
Oh lordy
Pick a bale of cotton
Oh lordy
Pick a bale a day
Oh lordy
Pick a bale of cotton
Oh lordy
Pick a bale a day
I said me and my buddy gonna pick a bale of cotton
Now me and my buddy gonna pick a bale a day
I said me and my buddy gonna pick a bale of cotton
Now me and my buddy gonna pick a bale a day
Oh lordy
Pick a bale of cotton
Oh lordy
Pick a bale a day
Oh lordy
Pick a bale of cotton
Oh lordy
Pick a bale a day


On top of old Smokey
all covered with snow
I lost my true lover
by courting so slow
For courting´s a pleasure
And parting is brief
and a false-hearted lover
is worse than a thief
On top of old Smokey
all covered with snow
I lost my true lover
by courting so slow

Well, you wake up in the morning
Hear the ding dong ring
You go marching to the table
See the same old thing
See the fork on the table
Nothing in your pan
If you say a thing about it
You´re in trouble with the man

Let the midnight special
Shine a light on me
Let the midnight special
Shine it´s everlovin´ light on me

If you ever go to Houston
Well you´d better act right
And you´d better not gamble
And you´d better not fight
For the sheriff will arrest you
And he´ll take you down
And before you understand it
You are prison bound

Let the midnight special
Shine a light on me
Let the midnight special
Shine it´s everlovin´ light on me (on me, on me)
Let the midnight special
Shine a light on me
Let the midnight special
Shine it´s everlovin´ light on me (on me, on me)
(repeat)

Akon-Ghetto

24. dubna 2007 v 20:33 | Verča |  Texty písní
Ghetto, Ghetto, Ghetto, Ghetto livin

[Verse one]

These streets remind me of quicksand (quicksand)
When your on it you´ll keep goin down (goin down)
And there´s noone to hold on too
And there´s noone to pull you out
You keep on fallin (falling)
And noone can here you callin
So you end up self destructing
On the corner with the tuli on the waist line just got outta the bing doin state time
Teeth marks on my back from the canine
Dark Memories of when there was no sunshine
Cause they said that I wouldn´t make it
(I remember like yesterday)
Holdin on to what god gave me

[Chorus]

Cause thats the life when ur
Living in the (ghetto)and
Eating in the (ghetto)or
Sleeping in the (ghetto) (ghetto)
Cause thats the life when ur
Living in the (ghetto)and
Eating in the (ghetto)or
Sleeping in the (ghetto, ghetto, ghetto)

[Verse two]

No need to cherish luxuries (cause everythin´ come and go)
Even the life that you have is borrowed
(Cause your not promised tomorrow)
So live your life as if everydays´ gon be your last
Once you move forward can´t go back
Best prepare to remove your past

Cause ya gotta be willin to pray
Yea There gotta be (there gotta be) a better way oh
Yea ya gotta be willing to pray
Cause there gotta be (there gotta be) a better day (ay)

Whoever said that this struggle would stop today
A lot of niggas dead or locked away
Teenage Women growing up with aids

[Chorus]

Cause thats the life when your
Living in the (ghetto) oh
Eating in the (ghetto) or
Sleeping in the (ghetto, ghetto)
Thats the life when ur
Living in the (ghetto)oh
Eating in the (ghetto) or
Sleeping in the (ghetto, ghetto, ghetto)

[Bridge]

Gun shots every night in the (ghetto)
Crooked cops on sight in the (ghetto)
Every day is a fight in the (ghetto)
(oh oh oh oh oh) (ghetto)
Got kids to feed in the (ghetto)
Selling coke and weed in the (ghetto)
Every day somebody bleed in the (ghetto)
(oh oh oh oh oh) (ghetto)

[Chorus]

Thats the life when your
Living in the (ghetto)oh
Living by the (ghetto)oh
Eating in the (ghetto, ghetto)
Thats the life when your
Living in the (ghetto)oh
Sleeping in the (ghetto)
Living in the (ghetto, ghetto, ghetto)

(wooohhoohh)

Akon-Lonely

24. dubna 2007 v 20:32 | Verča |  Texty písní
Lonely
I´m Mr lonely,
I have nobody,
for my owwwn
I'm so lonely,
I´m Mr. Lonely
I have nobody,
for my owwnnn
I'm so lonely

Y´all, this one here,
Goes out to all my playas out there, man, ya know
That got that one good girl, dawg
That's always been there man, like
took all the bullshit
Then one day she can't take it no more
And decided to leave

Yeah
I woke up in the middle of the night
And I noticed my girl wasn´t by mah side,
Coulda sworn I was dreamin for her
I was feelin,
So I had to take a little ride,
Back tracking on these few years,
Tryin to figure out what I do to make it go bad,
Cause ever since my girl left me,
My whole life came crashing and
I'm so

Lonely (so lonely),
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
for my own (to call my own,girl)

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
to call my own (to call my own,girl)

Can´t believe I had a girl like you
And I just let you walk right outta my life,
After all I put you through, you still stuck around and stayed by my side,
What really hurt me is I broke your heart, baby
You a good girl and I had no right,
I really wanna make things right, cause
Without you in my life girl, I'm so

Lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
for my own (to call my own,girl)

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
for my own (to call my own,baby)


Been all about the world ain´t never met a girl
That can take the things that you been through
Never thought the day would come
Where you would get up and run
And I would be out chasing you
Cause ain´t nowhere in the globe I´d rather be,
Ain´t no one in the globe I'd rather see
Then the girl of my dreams that made me be
so happy but now so lonely...

Lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
for my own (to call my own, no)

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
for my own (to call my own, girl)

Never thought that I´d be alone (be alone),
I didn't think you´d be gone this long, (gone so long)
I just want you to call my phone,
So stop playing girl and
Come on home (come on home),
Baby girl I didn´t mean to shout, (Nooo)
I want me and you to work it out, (work it out baby)
I never wished to ever
Hurt my baby (Hurt my baby)
And it's drivin me crazy cause I´m so..

Lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (have nobody)
for my own (to call my own,no)

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
for my own (to call my own,girl)

Lonely,
so lonely, (lonely)
So lonely, (so lonely)
Mr. Lonely (lonely)
So lonely (so lonely)
So lonely (lonely)
So lonely (so lonely)
So lonely (so lonely),
Mr. Lonely

Rihanna-SOS (Rescue me)

24. dubna 2007 v 20:31 | Verča |  Texty písní
[Intro]
Lalala lalala la la lala la Ohhh
You know... I never felt like this before
Lalala lalala la la lala la Ohhh
Feels like.. so real

[Verse 1]
I´m obsessive when just one thought of you comes up
I´m aggressive just one thought of closing up
You got me stressing, incessantly pressing the issue
´Cause every moment gone you know I miss you
I´m the question and you´re of course the answer
Just hold me close boy ´cause I´m your tiny dancer
You make me shaken up, never mistaken
But I can´t control myself, got me calling out for help

[Chorus:]
S.O.S. please someone help me.
It´s not healthy... for me to feel this way
Y.O.U. are making this hard,
I can´t take it, see it don´t feel right
S.O.S. please someone help me
It´s not healthy... for me to feel this way
Y.O.U. are making this hard
You got me tossin´ and turnin´ and can´t sleep at night

[Bridge:]
This time please someone come and rescue me
´Cause you on my mind it´s got me losing it
I´m lost, you got me lookin´ for the rest of me
Love is testing me but still I´m losing it
This time please someone come and rescue me
´Cause you on my mind, it´s got me losing it
I´m lost, you got me looking for the rest of me,
Got the best of me, so now I´m losing it

[Verse 2]
Just your presence and I second guess my sanity
Yes it´s a lesson, it´s unfair, you stole my vanity
My tummy´s up in knots so when I see you I get so hot
My common sense is out the door, can´t seem to find the lock
Take on me (uh huh) you know inside you feel it right
[CD version:] Take me on I´m put desire up in your arms tonight
[Video version:] Take me on, I could just die up in your arms tonight.
I´m out with you, you got me head over heels
Boy you keep me hanging on the way you make me feel

[Chorus:]
S.O.S. please someone help me.
It´s not healthy... for me to feel this way
Y.O.U. are making (Y.O.U.) this hard,
You got me tossin´ and turnin´ and can´t sleep at night

[Bridge:]
This time please someone come and rescue me
´Cause you on my mind, it´s got me losing it (´Cause you on my mind)
I´m lost, you got me lookin´ for the rest of me
Love is testing me but still I´m losing it
This time please someone come and rescue me (someone come and rescue me)
´Cause you on my mind got me losing it
I´m lost, you got me looking for the rest of me,
Got the best of me, so now I´m losing it

Boy, you know you got me feeling open
And boy, your loves enough with words unspoken
I said boy I´m telling you, you got me open
I don´t know what to do it´s true
I´m going crazy over you,
I´m begging

[Chorus:]
S.O.S. please somebody help me.
It´s not healthy... for me to feel this way
Y.O.U. are making this hard (are you making this hard for me, baby?),
You got me tossin´ and turnin´ and can´t sleep at night

[Bridge:]
This time please someone come and rescue me (someone rescue me)
´Cause you on my mind, it´s got me losing it
I´m lost, you got me lookin´ for the rest of me
Love is testing me but still I´m losing it
This time please someone come and rescue me
´Cause you on my mind got me losing it (´cause any time)
I´m lost you, got me looking for the rest of me,
Got the best of me (best of me), I´m losing it

[Outro]
Lala lala lala lala Ohhh
Ohh ohh lala lala lala lala
Oh oh

Avril Lavigne-Sk8er boi

24. dubna 2007 v 20:19 | Verča |  Texty písní
He was a boy
She was a girl
Can i make it any more obvious
He was a punk
She did ballet
What more can i say
He wanted her
She'd never tell secretly she wanted him as well
But all of her friends
Stuck up their nose
They had a problem with his baggy clothes

He was a skater boy
She said see you later boy
He wasn't good enough for her
She had a pretty face
But her head was up in space
She needed to come back down to earth

5 years from now
She sits at home
Feeding the baby she's all alone
She turns on tv
Guess who she sees
Skater boy rockin up MTV
She calls up her friends
They already know
And they've all got
Tickets to see his show
She tags along
Stands in the crowd
Looks up at the man that she turned down

He was a skater boy
She said see you later boy
He wasn't good enough for her
Now he's a super star
Slamming on his guitar
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?

He was a skater boy
She said see you later boy
He wasn't good enough for her
Now he's a super star
Slamming on his guitar
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?

Sorry girl but you missed out
Well tough luck that boy's mine now
We are more than just good friends
This is how the story ends
Too bad that you couldn't see
See the man that boy could be
There is more that meets the eye
I see the soul that is inside

He's just a boy
And Im just a girl
Can I make it any more obvious
We are in love
Haven't you heard
How we rock eachothers world

I'm with the skater boy
I said see you later boy
I'll be back stage after the show
I'll be at the studio
Singing the song we wrote
About a girl you used to know

I'm with the skater boy
I said see you later boy
I'll be back stage after the show
I'll be at the studio
Singing the song we wrote
About a girl you used to know

Avril Lavigne-Hot

24. dubna 2007 v 20:16 | Verča |  Texty písní
You´re so good to me Baby Baby

I wanna lock you up in my closet, when no one´s around
I wanna put your hand in my pocket, because you´re allowed
I wanna drive you into the corner, and kiss you without a sound
I wanna stay this way forever, I´ll say it loud
Now you´re in and you can´t get out

You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You´re so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream
You´re so fabulous
You´re so good to me Baby Baby
You´re so good to me Baby Baby

I can make you feel all better, just take it in
And I can show you all the places, you´ve never been
And I can make you say everything, that you never said
And I will let you do anything, again and again
Now you´re in and you can´t get out

You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You´re so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream

You´re so fabulous
You´re so good to me Baby Baby
You´re so good to me Baby Baby

Kiss me gently
Always I know
Hold me love me
Don´t ever go

You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You´re so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream
You´re so fabulous
You´re so good to me

You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You´re so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream
You´re so fabulous
You´re so good to me Baby Baby
You´re so good to me Baby Baby

You´re so

Vtipy o blondýnách

24. dubna 2007 v 20:13 | Verča |  Bžunda <3
Sedí dvě blondýnky v restauraci a objednají si pizzu. Číšník se ptá:"Chcete ji rozkrájet na čtyři nebo na osm dílů?"
A jedna z blondýnek odpoví: "Na čtyři, osm by jsme nesnědli."
Blondýnka si koupí vibrátor. Přinese si ho domů a zapne ho. Vibrátor se začne třepat a blondýnka říká: "Neboj se, taky to dělám poprvé."
Proč mají blondýnky o jednu mozkovou buňku více než krávy? Aby nebučely, když je zatáhnete za prsa.
Slyšeli jste o té blondýnce, která se zcvokla? Šest let pracovala v bordelu a pak zjistila, že ostatní holky si nechávají platit.
Policajt zastavi blondynu na ulici a rika: "Slecno, Vas pes nema kosik." "Ale my nejdeme nakupovat." "Prominte, to jsem nevedel."
Víte, proč blondýnky rozhazují na přechodu pro chodce chleba? -???- Chtějí nakrmit zebru.
Jede blondyna v aute a posloucha radio, kde zrovna rikaji vtipy o blondynach... Je cela rozzlobena... Najednou jede kolem kukuricneho pole a tam v poli sedi bloncka v lodi a vesluje... Rozzlobene na ni vola : "Ty kravo kvuli takovejm jako ses ty si o nas vsichni mysli ze sme uplne blby. Kdybych umela plavat tak tam skocim a zbiju te!!!"
Přijde blondýna do elektra a říká prodavači: chtěla bych tam tu malou televizi. Prodavač na ni: Blondýnám neprodáváme. Přijde druhý den a zas: chtěla bych tu malou televizi. Řekl sem že blondýnám neprodávám. Blondýna se nasere zajde se obarvit na černo a třetí den v prodejně chtěla bych tu malou televizi. A prodavač blondýnám neprodáváme. Ta už nasraná ptá se: jak ste poznal že jsem bloncka? To je jednoduché to není televize ale mikrovlnka.
Jede takhle blondýnka autem a narazí do stromu. Poté vylezele z auta, obejme strom a povídá: "Strome, stromečku, promiň, promiň, ale já troubila!"
Jednou se tak blondýnka rozhodne, že si bude psát své vědomosti do deníčku. Po dvou letech je na druhé stránce...
Jsou takhle tři blondýny na ostrově a radí se, jak pryč.
Připlave k nim zlatá rybka a řekne jim: "Každé z vás splním jedno přání!"
1. blondýna řekne: "Já chci být nejchytřejší na světě" A odplave.
2. blondýna řekne: "Já chci být úplně nejchytřejší na světě", stane se z ní bruneta a odplave na voru.
3. blondýna řekne: "Já chci ale být úplně nejchytřejší na celém světě", stane se z ní muž a odejde po mostu.
Jsou brunetka s blondýnkou na poušti a běží za nimi lev brunetka mu čas od času hodí písek do očí a lev si packama vytírá písek z očí a tím získají náskok najednou je před nimi palma a bruneta na ni rychle vyleze a blondína se opře o tu palmu brunneta blondýně říká: rychle musíš na tu palmu jinak tě lev sežere. A blondýna odpoví: Já mu písek do očí neházela
Jaký je rozdíl mezi blondýnkou v přechodu a pit-bullem?
Rtěnka.
Jaký je rozdíl mezi blondýnkou a trampolínou?
Než vlezete na trampolínu, sundáte si boty.
Jak láká brunetka chlapy?
"Všechny blondýnky už odešly!"
Jak láká ošklivá blondýnka chlapy?
(křičí) "Řekla jsem, že jsem opilá!!!"

Vtípky o tchýních

24. dubna 2007 v 20:09 | Verča |  Bžunda <3
Zvoní telefon: "Unesli jsme tvou tchyni, okamžitě pošli výkupné 100 000 dolarů!" - "A když odmítnu
zaplatit?" - Tak ti ji naklonujeme!"
"Můžete nám vysvětlit, jak k tomu došlo?" - "Loupal jsem si jablko a kousek slupky mi spadl na zem. Šla okolo tchyně, uklouzla na ní, padla mi na nůž a to se stalo osmkrát!"
Povídá kolega druhému: "Máš na drátě tchýni." - "Telefonuje nebo visí?"
"Nazdar, jak se máš?" - "Akorát jdu z pohřbu své tchýně." - "A proč jsi tak poškrábaný?" - "Bránila se!"
"Obžalovaný, proč jste shodil tchyni z balkonu?" - "Chtěl jsem se jen přesvědčit, jestli v té pohádce je pravda, že saň umí létat!"
Soudce: "Obžalovaný, můžete nám říci, proč jste vyhodil svou tchýni z okna na ulici?"
Obžalovaný: "Víte, pane soudce...."
Soudce:"To jste si neuvědomil, že byste mohl zranit chodce?"
Jak zjistíte, kolik je tchýni let? Uříznete jí hlavu a spočítáte letokruhy.
Co je to tchýně? Boží trest za to, že sis vzal její blbou dceru.
Jaký je rozdíl mezi palačinkou a tchýni?

Palačinka je dobrá, když je teplá a tchýně, když je studená ...
Inzerát: Daruji hada škrtiče, již prověřený, nutno odmotat z tchýně.

"Včera jsem měl konečně radost, že jsem opět uviděl svou tchýni." - "Ty máš rád svoji tchýni?" - "Ne, zavolali mě k identifikaci!"
Povídá manželka muži: "Miláčku, za chvíli budeme tři!"
"To je úžasná novina!"
"Taky si myslím. . . rodiče se rozvádějí a maminka se stěhuje k nám"
Vite, cim se zahrnuji milenky? Laskou.
A zeny? Kvetinami. A tchyne? Buldozerem.
Je možné ručníkem zabít tchýni? Ano, pokud je v něm žehlička.
Přijde manžel - hrobník domů strašně unavený, ruce vytahaný až ke kolenům a manželka se ho ptá: Hodně práce? Ne, pochovávali jsme jednu tchýni a pozůstalí tolik tleskali, že jsme ji museli osmkrát vytáhnout.
Lord provádí zámkem a ukazuje své lovecké trofeje. Mezi hlavami je i hlava s podivným úsměvem. "To je taky váš úlovek?" "Ano. Tchýně. Do poslední chvíle si myslela, že ji budu fotografovat."
Chlap vyhazuje tchýni z okna a říká jí: Vidíš ty čarodějnice, jinej by tě zabil a já tě pouštím na svobodu.
Jaký je rozdíl mezi tchyní a supem? Sup počká až umřeš!
Sejdou se takhle dva nájemní vrazi a jeden říká tomu druhýmu: "Člověče, dnes je pro nás normálně problém sehnat práci. No kdyby mi nepřišla včera tchýně, tak normálně vyjdu ze cviku."
Co to je? Ropucha a třicet žabiček? ??? Tchýně věší záclony.
Milacku, co dame moji mamince k vanocum? Vloni jsme ji koupili kreslo, co by se k tomu hodilo?
Co tak elektricky proud????
Jaké jsou slova v češtině začínající na tch?........Tchán tchýně a tchoř.
Víte, jak se dlouho vydržíte koukat na tchýni jedním okem?. Dokud nezmáčknete kohoutek...

Avril Lavigne-Girlfriend

24. dubna 2007 v 19:54 | Verča |  Texty písní
CHORUS:
Hey hey
You you
I don´t like your girlfriend
No way no way
I think you need a new one
Hey hey
You you
I could be your girlfriend

Hey hey
You you
I know that you like me
No way no way
You know it´s not a secret
Hey hey
You you
I want to be your girlfriend

You´re so fine
I want you mine
You´re so delicious
I think about you all the time
You´re so addictive
Don´t you know what I can do to make you feel all right?

Don´t pretend
I think you know I´m damn precious
And how, yeah, I´m the motherfucking princess
I can tell you like me too
And you know I´m right

BRIDGE:
She´s like so whatever
You can do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that´s what everyone´s talking about

CHORUS:
Hey hey
You you
I don´t like your girlfriend
No way no way
I think you need a new one
Hey hey
You you
I could be your girlfriend

Hey hey
You you
I know that you like me
No way no way
You know it´s not a secret
Hey hey
You you
I want to be your girlfriend

I can see the way I see
The way you look at me
And even when you look away
I know you think of me
I know you talk about me all the time
Again and again

So come over here
Tell me what I wanna hear
That I´ll, yeah, make your grilfriend disappear
I don´t wanna hear you say her name ever again
And again and again and again
Cause

BRIDGE:
She´s like so whatever
And you can do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that´s what everyone´s talking about

CHORUS:
Hey hey
You you
I don´t like your girlfriend
No way no way
I think you need a new one
Hey hey
You you
I could be your girlfriend

Hey hey
You you
I know that you like me
No way no way
You know it´s not a secret
Hey hey
You you
I want to be your girlfriend

Oh
In a second I´ll have you wrapped around my finger
Cause I can
Cause I can do it better
There´s no other
So when it´s gonna sink in?
She´s so stupid
What the hell were you thinking?

Oh
In a second I´ll have you wrapped around mt finger
Cause I can
Cause I can do it better
There´s no other
So when it´s gonna sink in?
She´s so stupid
What the hell were you thinking?

Hey hey
You you
I don´t like your girlfriend
No way no way
I think you need a new one
Hey hey
You you
I could be your girlfriend
No way, no way

Hey hey
You you
I know that you like me
No way no way
You know it´s not a secret
Hey hey
You you
I want to be your girlfriend
No way, no way

Hey hey
You you
I don´t like your girlfriend
No way no way
I think you need a new one
Hey hey
You you
I could be your girlfriend
No way, no way

Hey you...
No way...
Hey you...
No way no way
Hey hey!
A jako malý bonus...
...VIDEO pro vás!!!

Avril Lavigne-Complicated

24. dubna 2007 v 19:53 | Verča |  Texty písní
Uh-huh,
Life´s like this
Uh-huh, uh-huh
That´s the way it is
´Cause life´s like this
Uh-huh, uh-huh
That´s the way it is


Chill out,
What you yellin´ for?
Lay back, it´s all been done before
And if you could only let it be
You will see


I like you the way you are
When we´re, driving in my car
And you´re talking to me
One on one
But you become


Somebody else
´Round everyone else
Watchin´ your back
Like you can´t relax
You´re tryin´ to be cool
You look like a fool
To me


Tell me


Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you´re
Acting like you´re somebody else gets me frustrated
Life´s like this, you
And you fall and you crawl
And you break and you take
What you get and you turn it into
Honesty Promise me I´m never gonna find you fake it


No, no, no


You come over unannounced
Dressed up like you´re something else
Where you are and
Where you sat, you see
You´re making me
Laugh out
When you strike a pose
Take off all your preppy clothes
You know
You´re not fooling anyone
When you become


Somebody else
´Round everyone else
Watchin´ your back
Like you can´t relax
Tryin´ to be cool
You look like a fool
To me


Tell me


Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you´re
Acting like you´re somebody else gets me frustrated
Life´s like this, you
And you fall and you crawl
And you break and you take
What you get and you turn it into
Honesty Promise me
I´m never gonna find you fake it


No, no, no...


Chill out,
What you yellin´ for?
Lay back, it´s all been done before
And if you could let it be
You will see


Somebody else
´Round everyone else
You´re watchin´ your back
Like you can´t relax
You´re tryin´ to be cool
You look like a fool
To me, to me


Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you´re
Acting like you´re somebody else gets me frustrated
Life´s like this, you
And you fall and you crawl
And you break and you take
What you get and you turn it into
Honesty Promise me I´m never gonna find you fake it


No, no


Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you´re
Acting like you´re somebody else gets me frustrated
Life´s like this, you
And you fall and you crawl
And you break and you take
What you get and you turn it into
Honesty Promise me I´m never gonna find you fake it

Gwen Stefani-Orange county girl

24. dubna 2007 v 19:52 | Verča |  Texty písní
Don´t know what I´m doin´ back in the studio
Gettin´ greedy cause he said he had another sick flow
So I had to hollaback, guess I didn´t get enough
Still feel the wonderland, alice & the tick tock
If you gimme a clap, I´m gonna give an encore
Don´t want it to end, I want to stank some more
I´m trippin´ on the best dream that I never had
I guess behind the orange curtain it´s not so bad
From the west side, Anaheim, a small world after all
Hangin´ at the hotel, selling make-up at the mall
Makin´ out to purple rain, just like everybody else
Dame un beso, no stop I´m trying to save myself
Ordinary common girl way back in the 7-1-4 days
Trying to figure out what I wanna be
Hangin´ in the garage, me & ND

[CHORUS]
I´m just an Orange County Girl
Livin´ in an extraordinary world
I´m just an Orange County Girl
Livin´ in an extraordinary world
Sing - la la la la la la la
& my girls sing - la la la la la la la la
& then the guys sing - la la la la la la la
& the girls sing - la la la la la la la

A lot of things have changed, but I´m mostly the same
There are a few of my favourite things
Still rolling cuz the sound of music
& nothing better than a great big huge hit
You know I´d pay you just to let me write, dance & sing
I know I´m livin´ the e-ticket dream
For a girl from OC it´s almost undeard of
So I wanna thank you all so much for the love (especially my girlfriends)
Flew down to meet p, Make a hurricane in Miami
Workin´ with him, gonna get myself another grammy
I got the L.A.M.B & he´s rockin´ the ice cream
Blend it together, something fresh & kinda in between
Writing down my feelings is something that I love
So I don´t really give a fuck
Music don´t come in no colour
It´s time to move on, hit you with the chorus

[CHORUS]
I´m just an Orange County Girl
Livin´ in an extraordinary world
I´m just an Orange County Girl
Livin´ in an extraordinary world
Sing - la la la la la la la
& my girls sing - la la la la la la la la
& then the guys sing - la la la la la la la
& the girls sing - la la la la la la la

& the dream goes on & on & on & on
On & on & on & on
& the dream goes on & on & on & on
On & on & on & on
& the dream goes on & on & on & on
On & on & on & on
& the dream goes on & on & on & on
On & on &
& the dream goes

[CHORUS]
I´m just an Orange County Girl
Livin´ in an extraordinary world
I´m just an Orange County Girl
Livin´ in an extraordinary world
Sing - la la la la la la la
& my girls sing - la la la la la la la la
& then the guys sing - la la la la la la la
& the girls sing - la la la la la la la

Gwen Stefani-4 In the morning

24. dubna 2007 v 19:51 | Verča |  Texty písní
Waking up to find another day
The moon got lost again last night
But now the sun has finally had its say
I guess I feel alright

But it hurts when I think
When I let it sink in
It´s all over me
I´m lying here in the dark
I´m watching you sleep, it hurts a lot
& all I know is
You´ve got to give me everything
Nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

[CHORUS]
I give you everything that I am
I´m handin´ over everything that I´ve got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don´t ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we´re gonna do it, come on do it right

All I wanted was to know I´m safe
Don´t want to lose the love I´ve found
Remember when you said that you would change
Don´t let me down
It´s not fair how you are
I can´t be complete, can you give me more?
& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

[CHORUS]
I give you everything that I am
I´m handin´ over everything that I´ve got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don´t ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we´re gonna do it, come on do it right

Oh please, you know what I need
Save all your love up for me
We can´t escape the love
Give me everything that you have

& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

[CHORUS]
I give you everything that I am
I´m handin´ over everything that I´ve got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don´t ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we´re gonna do it, come on do it right

(Give you everything)
(Give you all of me

Gwen Stefani-Cool

24. dubna 2007 v 19:50 | Verča |  Texty písní
It´s hard to remember how it felt before
Now I found the love of my life...
Passes things get more comfortable
Everything is going right

And after all the obstacles
It´s good to see you now with someone else
And it´s such a miracle that you and me are still good friends
After all that we´ve been through
I know we´re cool

We used to think it was impossible
Now you call me by my new last name
Memories seem like so long ago
Time always kills the pain

Remember Harbor Boulevard
The dreaming days where the mess was made
Look how all the kids have grown
We have changed but we´re still the same
After all that we´ve been through
I know we`re cool

And I´ll be happy for you
If you can be happy for me
Circles and triangles, and now we´re hangin´ out with your new girlfriend
So far from where we´ve been
I know we´re cool